Smart(?)phone woes and some pretty butterflies

We finally took the plunge and got smartphones for ourselves last weekend. We must be almost the last people in the country to invest in this wonderful not-so-new-anymore technology. Why do they call them smartphones? Could it be because the phone is, indeed, smarter than a 5th grader? I doubt it.

It took days forever to get all most of the settings properly set so that it didn’t tell me about a new email or Facebook post every 2.5 seconds and run the battery down so I couldn't even make a call if I wanted to. But the most challenging thing about this phone, so far, is texting. I didn’t get an iPhone because I didn’t have $400 laying around under the mattress and we didn’t want to pay outrageous monthly rates with a Sprint or some other contract carrier. We went with Virgin Mobile. I have an LG Optimus Elite. It has all of the features I wanted and then some. I don’t really believe that the iPhone is any more intelligent than any other phone anyway. And it’s made by Apple, I’m not a huge Apple fanatic. But I digress. Back to the texting challenge.

I received a text from my darling daughter late the other night, asking what I was doing. It was late and I was getting ready to go to bed. Or so I thought. I have sent a few text messages and it was no big deal, but for some reason this phone decided it was time to have a little fun with me. I guess it was bored.

I clicked Reply, the keyboard popped up and I tried to type Getting, as in “Getting ready to go to bed” (I refuse to succumb to texting abbreviations). I got as far as G e t and this smart(ass)phone decided that what I really meant to say was fetch. Ok, I have fat fingers, so maybe it was operator error. I tried it again. Get. Fetch. Seriously? Not one to be easily dissuaded, I gave it another shot, carefully watching which letters lit up when I touched them. G e t. Fetch. WHAT?? Not operator error at all.

Knowing the definition of insanity, I decided to abandon the keyboard, took a deep breath and delved into the settings yet again. Swype settings….all good there. Android keyboard settings…turn off ALL autocorrect functions. Done. Go back and try again. You got it. Fetch. Sigh. Yes, I tried several more times and got the same result. Insanity. I know. I resisted the urge to fling the phone across the room, remembering I had not purchased insurance on it.

This went on for half an hour or longer….typing, checking the settings, typing again. At one point during the madness I just happened to look more closely at the keyboard and noticed that the little button with the world on it said ES. What does that mean?? It is right next to the change-from-letters-to-numbers key and since they are all pretty tiny, maybe I touched it by mistake at some point and it is the cause of all the confusion. I clicked on it/touched it. Nothing happened. It still said ES. Once more into the settings I go and after wandering blindly in there for a while, I found the language settings had been set to Spanish. Who did that? When did that happen? How did I miss it the other 38 times I have looked at the settings? It was getting (fetching?) later and I didn’t care who or when or how, so I changed it back to English and it was all good again – at LAST! But one thing still bothers me. The Spanish word for “get” is not “fetch”. Smartphone? HA!

If you’re still with me, I do have a couple of cards to show you for your trouble. Thank you for hanging in there.

I needed some cards to send to my sister and a few to use for my pen pal letters, something quick and easily reproduced. The butterfly die from Memory Box made short work of it.


A little pretty paper behind the negative space left by the die, pop it up onto the card front, add a sentiment banner…BOOM! Done. I need a little practice with the white gel pen, I think. The line is a little wonky here and there, but hey – it’s handmade. Deal with it, right?

Join me next week for more Tales from the Smartphone. Or maybe just some more pretty cards to look at (at which to look, Leslie?).


  1. Nice cards, Jackie. I am still in that backwoods place of no smart phone and after reading your story, I'm happy to stay!

  2. I hate it when the phone auto-corrects your spelling and totally picks some random word :(, loved reading your account of your trials :). Great cards, really like the pps peaking out from behind the negative space, pretty bright colors too!

  3. Hahahaha, sorry! I don't have a 'smart' phone either!Apparently mine's an android, whatever that is, but I'm happy with it!
    Nice cards!

  4. You are not alone... look what happens when I do an emoticon smiley face :)I WHY??? I probably set it that way on accident. Sigh. I use smiley faces all the time! Learning curve... gotta love it. This thing would make a fabulous skipping stone, quite satisfying for about 10 seconds until I want to check Facebook! Ha!

  5. P.S. I need to make butterfly borders like these! Fab!

  6. I laughed all the way though your post! (I have an iPhone and the spelling auto-correct sometimes changes what I typed into obscenities! EEK!) Anyway, thanks for the laugh! Your butterfly cards are wonderful, too...so glad I stopped by!

  7. Wonky is GOOD. At least in MY world it is.

    Now, about that phone. I don't own i-anything, and I only got my Crackberry so I could Tweet. The first time I had to sue it as a phone I didn't know what to do. And I butt-dial people with my fat fingers all the time. Phone -- pffth.

    PS: A co-worker's computer keeps changing her default language to French, and her documents are 100% underlined ALL. THE. TIME. She's taken to shouting I DO NOT SPEAK FRENCH! It's hysterical.

    Good luck with that.

  8. PS: I think I may have purchased that border die. ;/

  9. hahahahahahaha!!!!! I'd have just called rather than text because I would have thrown the phone.

    Great set of cards!

  10. Hi Jackie,
    You post made me Laugh Out Loud!! I also am "stuck in time" and do not have a "Smart Phone", as I say to my hubby...I know I'm old and still have a "dumb" phone, but it works for me? However, I have now decided that I will brave the new world on my next upgrade and likely try to avoid ANY contracts. Time will tell. I've heard lots of good things about Virgin Mobile, so that may be what I choose! I have a LG phone now (dumb) one, but I do like it! :)

    Thanks for the sweet comment you left on my blog. You had asked about an embossing folder and I'm not sure which one you meant, s I used two on the card with the Butterfly. The butterfly was embossed in a older folder, by Tim Holtz/Sizzix and the blue background was done in a new folder that is from Lifestyle Crafts. I believe I bought it from Simon Says Stamps and they now have several folders on the market! :)

    Hope that helps and GOOD Luck with you phone...sounds like a bit of a challenge? I'm not a fan of the Predictive text...even when it's in English...as it never seems to choose the WORD I intended to type? GO Figure!!

  11. You are hilarious! I can't take my eyes off what you did here... It's great!!


Thanks for stopping by, I love reading your comments.